Two Slices of Bread

Lunch is kind of a non-event around the Bird house.

Most often, I serve Bryce chicken fingers or leftovers.

Sometimes I get creative and boil up mac and cheese.

Every once in a while, it involves a toy in a box.

You get the idea- no fuss.

Simple.

Easy to do with a baby sleeping in my arms and two dogs under foot.

Lately, Bryce has taken a liking to bread.

Plain bread.

No cheese.

No meat.

No PB or J.

Just bread.

He probably would like honey drizzled on top, but Josh and I keep forgetting to purchase it on grocery day.

And you know I am NOT going all the way back to Meijers for a bottle of honey.

I digress.

A few days ago, Bryce yet again went into the fridge for his two slice main course.

As he was walking to the living room to sit down and have a "carpet picnic"- which is my term for him eating on the living room floor so I can relax on the couch while he eats because it takes him forever to gobble up two plain pieces of bread- I had the idea to surprise him with one of his favorites, an individually wrapped package of goldfish.

Due to expense, they are normally saved for Kayden's lunch. Bryce had been such a great kid, and so helpful, that I really wanted to reward him.

Plus, I feel guilty he eats like our ducklings.

My stubborn child did not want to see what I had for him.

He wanted what he wanted, and that was all there was to it.

He clutched one piece in each hand and, almost to the point of crumbling both of them, held on tight.

No amount of coercion would get him to see that something better might be in my hand than the bread in his.

I know I have done a lot of reflecting around here lately, so I hope I have not tired you with my anecdotes.

Of all my blessings from God, I would have to say my family tops the list.

I don't think that is a bad thing.

On January 17, I admitted that I had finally surrendered trying to control my family to God, after a long struggle with clutching them ever so tightly.

With both hands finally wide open, God gave me more than I even asked for bringing Tessa to our family.

Don't get me wrong. Looking at this from the top of the mountain is so much easier than from mid-climb. Many days, I questioned if I would ever get here. No doubt about it, I would have chosen an easier path in lieu of the extra blessings we received along the long and arduous journey.

See this beautiful dress Tessa is wearing?

My good friend Chelle reminded me of the significance this tulle and satin represents.

Two days after Tessa was born, Heidi and Kristi brought me a bag full of girly goodies, including this outfit.

Visions of her much, much larger and able to wear this were simultaneously uneasy and yet incredibly wonderful. Her future had been uncertain for so long that it was strange to immediately flip that switch and believe she was alive and thriving. For the first four days, I asked every medical person that I could find about Tessa's lungs. I needed constant reassurance that they wouldn't all the sudden become hypoplastic.

As I put her in this dress, my heart sings with a gratitude and joy that last Christmas I never thought I would experience. I am reminded that sometimes I need to stop clutching and open my hands wide for all the blessings God wants to bestow.

Psalm 31:19 How great is your favor, which you store up for your loyal followers! In plain sight of everyone you bestow it on those who take shelter in you.