Sewing and Sitting

Have I ever told you how my love affair with sewing began?

We were newly married, living separate lives. Josh taught during the day. I was waitressing at night.

There were many long, lonely hours in our apartment.

Shopping is only fun when you have money.

My mom suggested I find a hobby.

Long before Project Runway made it cool, I watched a friend of ours sew a crisp red banner for Redlands Christian and it looked fun.

Excitedly, I told my mom about the new craft I wanted to master and she offered up her machine. A 15-year-old Singer, solid metal hunk of a machine. As I lugged it through three airports and two car rides, I am pretty certain it weighed at least fifty pounds.

"The next time I come out to California, I will teach you," said Jan.

Visions of new dresses, fabulous tops, and fashionable hand sewn accessories flooded my mind. My patience couldn't wait long enough for my mom's tutelage. Seven library books taught me the basics of about gathering, basting, buttons, and back stitch.

A new robe was the first thing I wanted to assemble, so I headed to JoAnns. To my surprise, the fabric would cost me $30.

I could purchase it new for that.

Futhermore, I didn't want to spend all that money to mess up and have to throw it out. We could go to In and Out three times for that kind of dough, after all.

Without a baby on the horizon, I decided that would be my first style to master. One yard would yield an entire outfit with booties, hat, and bloomers to match. I found a great deal on pink flannel and lace, and set to work sewing this:

Side note: Nastalgic to a fault, it was the first blanket I used with Tessa girl. I cherish this, although there are so many flaws and mistakes.

I wish you could see it in person. I actually hand sewed the entire binding. If you know anything about me, you will know that (now) I would rather break ten needles trying to shove it through my machine than hand sew a single stitch.

The next year was spent sewing everything. Nothing was off limits. I loved purchasing a new pattern from the store, picking out just the right material, and sitting down with a cup of hot chocolate and my Singer.

Josh parents gifted me with a brand new embroidery sewing machine on Valentine's Day in 2003. Working with a machine that threaded the bobbin without me hand reeling it was a treat. It remains one of my most treasured gifts.

Then I started sewing for work.

It was fun at first. The thrill of seeing something sell.

Three years and hundred and hundreds of hours into it, somewhere it lost it's luster.

I rarely wanted to sew on my time off.

I did not want to create.

Sitting behind the sewing machine for pleasure reminded me of the many projects sitting next to me that had to be finished. It was easier to get those completed than sit down with a fresh yard and an idea.

Even the fabric store, which I previously loved to peruse, lost it's appeal.

Being on bedrest forced me to, well, rest.

Let go of obligations.

Clear the schedule.

And as much as I miss going out and about with Tessa, there is such beauty in this season.

Before this happened, I would describe my life as a constant state of running (aren't we all?!)

23 round trips to Ypsilanti, regular OB visits, Kayden's basketball practices and Saturday games, Josh's coaching, church obligations, volunteering, room mom, class projects, committees, field trips, keeping the house clean, bringing meals, dinners, coffee dates, MiniMe BabyGear....the list goes on and on and on.

I never said No.

By the end of the day, I would lay down to start praying, and crash in the first few minutes of prayer. My intentions were good, I was just so stinking tired.

Running so much, I didn't have time to sit down with God. Relax in my favorite spot on the couch and read my Bible. Pray for others. Listen. Write things down I want to work on.

There is great fellowship with God in the quiet. Rather, the quiet and conscious. I didn't even realize what I was missing.

Two years ago, a lot of my friends did "Activity Buckets"- you put a bunch of ideas of things you can do together on crumpled up on slips of paper inside a bin, and then draw one out each day to complete.

I always wanted to do it, but was too busy.

We have instituted a new after dinner routine:

Each picks an activity and we play together until they fight:-)

I can say with certainty that I am loving this season of staying home. Although I wouldn't characterize our lives with a very feisty newborn as idle, there is charm in this stage of our lives.

I am even sewing again for fun:

"The men who have done the most for God in this world have been early on their knees. He who fritters away the early morning, its opportunity and freshness, in other pursuits than seeking God will make poor headway seeking Him the rest of the day. If God is not first in our thoughts and efforts in the morning, He will be in the last place the remainder of the day." E.M. Bounds